Contributed by: Arshita
Mentors perform a series of essential activities – acting as a sounding board, providing guidance, being a cheerleader, advocating for your success, empathetically listening and sometimes just saying “I agree, this sucks!”. While there is so much more that can be written about the mentor-mentee relationship, couple of themes I found valuable are…
Take the leap, its only scary until you jump!
When I joined grad school, we received an invite to register for a mentor match program. As someone who never had a formal mentor before, I was curious and decided to register for the program.
Four weeks later, voilà, I had my first mentor – Jen! We exchanged email introductions and setup a time for our first meeting. I am an introvert who will find every plausible reason to escape interacting with new people. Being true to my nature, I thought of every excuse to not meet Jen but finally decided to go. I am so glad I did, because it led to a beautiful friendship. Jen was very generous with her time and took a lot of effort to address questions I had -professional and personal. I fondly remember the times we explored eateries in Columbus together for our meetups. I was new to the town and she would take us to a new and exciting place each time! I will never forget her valuable contribution to my life at a time when I was in a new environment with new challenges, and needed someone who had walked that road before.
There is no alternate to being authentic
One of my mentors today is also one of my most dear friends. Our relationship has evolved over the years into a strong trusting bond. While she has moved to a different organization, we still are each other’s advisors on a variety of topics.
I strongly believe this was possible because I was always authentic with her. I could have chosen the path to manage my “image” with her and show only the good. After all, she was my manager and responsible to make my performance case each year to the senior leadership. Instead, I chose to stay authentic – she saw the good and the bad. I valued her life-altering advice much more than her equally impressive ability to negotiate better performance ratings. Because I was open and honest with her, I took bold career decisions, knowing she had my back.
Having a trusted, personal board of advisors is important to navigate life. I believe everyone can benefit from having a mentor (and being one) – it truly is a special relationship!
About the Author:
Arshita works as a management consultant. She is a highly energetic, down-to-earth woman, a trail-blazer, deeply invested in empowering women. She is my ex-manager’s wife and now a dear friend. She is unlike anybody I have known personally – a super confident, fearless, breathtaking personality who is constantly treading new waters and there is no stopping in her dictionary!